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Transcript of last-known C-Deezy interview

TJ: Welcome to this special broadcast on the Deezies SportsRadio Network. I'm Ty Jackson, and you know me as the host of the Deezies Afterparty, a position that I enjoyed for the better part of two years, mostly because of the relationship that I was able to build with C-Deezy fa Sheezy, the head coach and, truly, the heart of the Deezies fa Sheezies. I couldn't imagine doing a show without him. But now, that's what I have to do. As you know, C-Deezy has been missing for over two weeks now. While the search continues, the trail grows colder with each passing day. We had originally planned to air the interview that you are about to hear shortly after it was recorded, but that was before C-Deezy's disappearance. Now that the authorities have reviewed this tape for any possible leads, we have received the go-ahead to air it without edit. We now present to you, the last known interview with C-Deezy fa Sheezy.

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CD: Yo, Ty! What the happy-haps, yo? I ain't seen you in a minute!

TJ: It's been alright. I've been keepin' busy... catching up on some filing, trying to make the best use of my free time.

CD: Oh yeah. Yo, sorry 'bout that, dog. You know how they be rollin' round here.

TJ: It's alright... hey, what happened to your chains?

CD: What you mean, yo?

TJ: What happened to your chains?

CD: My gold chains?

TJ: Yeah.

CD: They bein' cleaned. They at the chain cleaners.

TJ: I didn't know they had special places for that.

CD: Yeah.

TJ: Wait. I don't understand. You leave the chains there overnight?

CD: Yeah.

TJ: Well, how does a chain cleaner carry the kind of insurance premiums to cover...

CD: Don't worry 'bout it. It's the Afterparty, yo! Ask me some questions!

TJ: Okay... well, let's start with the big one, the grand jury investigation. The rumors are out there, that you're part of an organized crime ring, that you've been implicated in an illegal sports betting operation, you've been using your influence to affect the outcome of some games... now, Deezy, I've known you for a minute now, so I had to laugh at some of these, but can you clear it up for everyone in the listening audience?

CD: Yeah, that just be a whole lot of misunderstandings and coincidences that be tied together and blown outta proportion, yo. Ain't no crime ring, ain't no sports-bettin', and ain't no point-shavin' goin' on, and that's my word! What happened was, I had to fly out west to audition for my movie, THUGTASTIC!, and I had a layover in Vegas, so I decided to have me a little fun, ya know what I'm sayin'? And I'm a high roller... ain't nobody gonna catch me playin' those nickel slots at the airport. They gonna find me in VIP, playin' some stud! So I'm blowin' 10, 20, 30k a shot, but I'm just outta rehab, so I'm havin' the time a' my life, yo! And dude sits next to me, so I'm watchin' out the corner of my eye, and he sees me lookin', and he's like, "yo, why you starin'?" and I'm like, "yo, why you sit next to me?" And that's when he's like, "You C-Deezy fa Sheezy! How's it goin'?" And I ain't know the cat, but I'm always cool cuz I ain't want no trouble, so we chat it up for a few minutes, and then he get up and go to another table, and I ain't see him again until his face was on the news, yo!

TJ: You're talking about LaRon "Bookie" Williams?

CD: Yeah, whatever his name be! I ain't know him from Adam!

TJ: Well, Deezy, there are reports that the two of you are long-time acquaintances.

CD: Yo, just cuz dude grew up in the same hood as me, lived on the same block, right next door to me, went to the same schools, the same church, the same clubs, played the same sports, rode in the back of the same paddy wagons... that don't mean we be knowin' each other, yo! They just be tryin' to make connections where they ain't be any!

TJ: So the report today, that Williams has been formally indicted on 27 counts of racketeering and conspiracy to commit fraud, you're not connected in any way?

CD: No way, yo! I ain't had nothin' to do wit' im! All I know is they saw me talkin' to him on some kinda video tape, so they call me in and wanna know what I had to say. Ya know, somebody once told me that what ever happen in Vegas is supposed to stay in Vegas, yo. Apparently that ain't the case now, ya know what I'm sayin'? I cain't go nowhere without catchin' a case!

TJ: I hear ya, Deezy! But there's another case that's had your name linked to it... Travis Henry, used to play for the Deezies, this year he's with 18 and life, and, the day he's supposed to wrap his league probation, he tests positive for marijuana and faces the possibility of a full year suspension. Now, the league has decided that, instead of the suspension, he's going to remain in the testing program, but, again, it's been said that you had something to do with his testing positive.

CD: Yo, that ain't how it all went down. Lemme keep it real wit' you, Ty. You know me. I ain't never been about that kinda thing, and just cuz I spent a coupla' months in rehab for prescriptions don't mean I'm into all those street drugs. What happen is they wanna paint all us true playas with the same brush, tryin' to make it look like we all into the same ish and we all be stupid 'bout it.

TJ: So what happened?

CD: Word. So the season's over, we all 'bout to go our separate ways, and I get a call from Vick, and he's like, "yo, I'm killin' down in Atlanta, I'mma throw a party and celebrate." And I'm like, "Bet! You bring your dogs, I'mma bring mine, and we gonna blow the woofers out, yo!" So I put the call out, cuz it gotta be bigger than big, and so Travis, he call me up and he was like, 'I got this cousin that's thinkin' about playin' in the league next year, I'mma bring him to tha party with me.' And I'm like, 'bring yo' brother Chris, too! It's gonna be off tha chain!' So this big-ass stretch limo picks us up at the airport... me, Travis, his brother Chris, and his cousin Chris... and we head out to Vick's place, and it's crunk in there, just loud, and Vick meets us at the door, and he's like, "yo, my little brother Marcus, he's got the hook-up in the green room," and I thought he was talkin' about Playstation, so we go to the room, and we open the door, and smoke just start pourin' out, yo, but there's the microphone, so I'm like, "yo, let me hop on that beat!" And I start droppin' rhymes galore... you know how I do... just killin' it, and LJ, he was there, and he was like, "let me get the mic for a minute," so we start doin' this posse cut... man, you ain't never heard anything that dope, yo! They start addin' all these crazy-ass samples, these barks and whines, and I get the mic back, and I'm like, "who let the dogs out?" and, all of a sudden, next thing I know, everybody's all in a panic, trippin' over each other, tryin' to get out the house! I cain't find Travis, I cain't find Chris, I cain't find the other Chris, so I end up catchin' a ride with Jerramy... you know, he used to play tight end for us... and we end up hittin' the bars, and I ain't remember nothin' after that except wakin' up in my own puke, yo. And I guess the next day, Travis failed his piss test, but that ain't on me, yo! All I done did was go to a party and have a good time that I cain't remember!

TJ: Fair enough. Let's move on to the next topic, the pending disorderly conduct charge...

CD: He ain't got no case, yo! I ain't do nothin' but put a couple of my signature moves on 'im, and he cain't say wrestlin' be "fake" and be claimin' that I hurt 'im, on tha real! And he wuz askin' for it, questionin' my heart and my manhood, yo... I shoulda put anotha' driveby on his ass!

TJ: Actually, I was going to ask about your arrest at the Marlette Burger King.

CD: Oh, that one. I got a lot goin' on right now, Ty. You know I cain't keep it all straight.

TJ: No problem, I got you! So you're on the road, in Marlette. After the game, you and some of the players decide to stop for a quick bite to eat, so you go into the local Burger King. You get your food, and before you sit down, you excuse yourself to, and I quote, "take care of some business," unquote. You walked into that bathroom, Deezy. Six minutes later, you were under arrest.

CD: Yeah.

TJ: And your career was in jeopardy, and your freedom was in jeopardy. So, how should we handle this? Do you want to tell me what happened?

CD: Ty, I wanna tell you the story, yo. And lemme tell you why, on tha real... all the media, they been gettin' it twisted, yo. You be hearin' just one side, and they ain't recognizin' mine. So, yo, I go to tha' bathroom cuz I gotta take a mad dump, yo. I walk by the stalls, and I glance at them to see whether they be occupied. I stand out in front of 'em waitin', tryin' to hold it all in, and as soon as that stall opened up, yo, I was in it to win it!

TJ: But let me -- let me stop you. According to this officer, he says that when the stall next to him became available, that you walked in and the first thing you did was you began to tap your foot like this.

CD: Yeah! I had to go, but, you know, I'd just gotten back from that game, so I was still wound up and I needed to relax, yo. So I'm tryin' to get rid of some o' that extra energy, tryin' to relax so that I don't get all backed up, just tryin' to do my thang, ya know what I'm sayin'?

TJ: He says then with his left foot, the one closest to you, he slowly raised and lowered his foot.

CD: Yeah, he was tappin' his foot too! And I'm sittin' there, tappin' my foot, and then he start tappin' his foot in time with mine, and I'm like, yo, that's tha' beat from THUGTASTIC, so I start droppin' the verse... "I rock out with my cock out / clear tha' whole block out / Thugtastic is tha' name / you know what I be 'bout..."

TJ: The next thing he says that happened is that you made a hand gesture to him. And the gesture, according to this police officer, undercover officer, was not made with the hand closest to the stall where he was. It was made with your left hand.

CD: You know how I do, Ty. I start flowin', and I'm all in it, throwin' signs, mean-muggin'... I gotta feel it! And as soon as I finished my flow, there's this card under tha' divider sayin' "Police, step out."

TJ: According to the police report, what the police officer heard you say was, "no."

CD: Naw, what I said was "hell no!", as in "hell no, you ain't no cop!" And I pulled my pants up, and stepped outta tha' stall, and he grabbed me, yo! I ain't even get a chance to wash my hands! So I'm gonna swing on 'im, and he be all like, "you under arrest for solicitations," and I'm like, I ain't do nothin'! And then anotha cop rolled up on us, and they cuffed me and walked me back out in front of my boys!

TJ: Because according to this undercover officer, you followed, whether on purpose or coincidentally, a very well established sequence of motions, well established by members of the gay community to solicit sex in public places.

CD: Yo, how I supposed to know they be usin' my rhymes like that? All I did was drop trou and be myself, yo, on tha real!! So I tell my boys, as they be takin' me out the buildin', I be tellin' 'em, "Y'all find out where they be takin' me, and make sure y'all get me up outta there! And don't forget my fries and soda, yo!"

TJ: You were charged with one count of disorderly conduct and, according to this report, spent five hours in jail before posting bail.

CD: That's cuz my boys took forever to get there, yo! Ain't nobody wanna fess up to who wuz drivin', but I was mad pissed, on tha real! My fries got cold, yo! How'm I supposed ta eat cold fries, yo?

TJ: I don't know, Deezy! But obviously, with an incident like this, and, frankly, given your history, are you going to be more vigilant in the future?

CD: Yo, that's a big word, Ty. All I know is that I'm gonna be on tha lookout from now on. I now know that this cop be -- this po-po be a profiler, yo, and I ain't meanin' Ric Flair! He say looking into a stall was one of it. And then a hand gesture or a foot tap is another one... Now I be knowin' all about profilin', yo. I be knowin' what people be feelin' like when they be profiled, on tha' real! When innocent people get caught up in what I was caught in as an innocent person, it make me wanna do a Driveby on a reporter, yo!

TJ: Speaking of which... you really shouldn't have done that, you know.

CD: I know! But he had it comin', yo! Sometimes I cain't help myself!

TJ: No, I mean... well, we've gotta talk about the Deezies' 2007 season, and how it ended on Sunday...

CD: Yo, that was complete bull, straight up, yo!

TJ: Be that as it may, the score was what it was, and the team won't be making the trip to play in Dundee. Can you comment on that?

CD: Yeah, I gotta comment! B-Dub, White Lightnin'... they was messin' wit' my head from the start! Showin' up on Wednesday without they wifeys... and then come to find out that Missus Lightnin' be pregnant! Yo, I already got four kids by five baby mamas... I ain't needin' another one, yo!

TJ: What about the game, Deezy? All the talk before the game centered on your history with L-T, but the Champs were shut down the entire first half, and then things started to unravel. What happened?

CD: What happened is the zebras started goin' inta business for theyselves, yo! It was just like the game in Marlette, all those cheap hits and bad calls, but we wuz holdin' on, cuz we had that lead, right? So I'm goin' over a coupl'a plays with Tony, gettin' ready for the next series, and I'm about to send him out there, and there's already somebody in the huddle! So I was like "what tha hell be goin' on, yo?" But those zebras, they was actin' like they couldn't see me, yo! They wouldn't stop the game! So I'm lookin' at the dude, and then I recognize him! It was Kurt Warner, yo! And as soon as I see him, he turned, yo! He turned, he winked at me, and then he threw the ball right into coverage, yo! That Trufant guy ran it all the way back, and that was the game right there, yo! And the league ain't gonna do a damn thing about it, cuz they wanna see me fail! Townsend wanna keep his trophy, and he know he cain't take me, so he gonna take his chances with L-T! But I ain't hatin', yo. I woulda done the same thing if I'da been in charge. And... ha ha... it ain't like anybody lost money on the game... ha ha... no money, no problems, right? Right?

TJ: Well, I don't know how your contract is set up, but you probably lost out on some bonuses.

CD: Yeah, but I got paid durin' the season, so it wasn't no life-or-death sit-chee-ay-shun. Ain't nobody gotta die over a game, yo. We can talk it out.

TJ: Uh, yeah. So, you've got the Fantasy Football Fever awards ceremony in two weeks... you're up for Coach of the Year... and then what's next for C-Deezy fa Sheezy?

CD: Yo, I'mma keep it movin'. I got me a whole lotta unfinished business, so I ain't gonna dwell on the past. The Deezies, we had a good run, especially this year, and just cuz it didn't turn out like we planned doesn't mean we gonna curl up in a ball and die. We gonna go out on our own terms, keep doin' what we do until we cain't do it no mo', on tha real.

TJ: Last question, Deezy. Given all that has happened to you over the past couple of years, do you ever think about just stepping away from it all?

CD: What am I supposed to do, yo? I'm C-Deezy fa Sheezy! Cain't nobody else do it like me! I be who I be cuz that's what y'all be expectin'! Ain't nobody wanna buy a leopard and spray paint it! I'mma stay Deezy 'til I die, and that's word life!

TJ: It's been a pleasure seein' you, Deezy.

CD: You take care of yourself, playa. I'll see you on the flip.

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TJ: And those were the final words that Deezy said to me. After the interview was over, he met with DSL President and CCO Carson L. Rizor, then said goodbye to some staff people, and rode off. He hasn't been seen since. I'm not yet ready to believe that he's gone, and I hope that someone, somewhere, listening to this interview, will know something, and we'll find Deezy safe and sound. Thank you for listening. I'm Ty Jackson. One love.


12-26-2007

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