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Charter Fishing in Clarkston

Yes, step right up folks. Charter fishing is back in Clarkston, MI, available directly from LordLonely tours.

You too can go fishing in a glorious weekend (weekdays by appointment only) on the fabulous Greens Lake river system. What do I get for coming you ask?  Why the full use of a 14 foot aluminum hull boat with a high powered 9 hp  Johnson outboard. A multitude of fishing accessories covering everything from your rod and reel, live bait, to tackle, and nets for those monster fish. By god, I'll even throw in those seat cushions for a spot to rest from all the fast and furious action. Even get your picture taken with humoungus stringers. You can have a grilled outdoor lunch/dinner, full bathroom priveleges, and tour the scenic night life after a fun day of fishing. But this sounds too good to be true. Wait, only the following conditions apply (seperate rules for men and women)

Rules for Men and Women:

1. must have and idea of what fishing is and to be aware of your tackle at all times.  I will not have you carelessly chucking your line around, only to hook somebody in the nose. (This has happened before in my presence and hence the creation of this most important of rules). Failure to understand and abide by this rule is for 1 month expulsion, and a 6 month probation with mandatory 'This is my fishing pole, this is my hook' lessons.

2. This is a working boat. All material including your fuel and high tech safety gear will be provided. It is expected that you participate in some duty while on board.  This includes, but is not limited to, anchor duty, monitoring live bait, helping land fish, driving the boat, manning the ice chest, rowing, and anything else the captain sees fit for the day.

3. All topics of discussion while on board shall deal from a male point of view. None of 'Why is there no female viagra?' topics are to ever be raised.

4. You are on your own as to sun protection, but some can be provided for you, but no guarantee to quantities at the time.

Rules for Men

5. payment for trip may be done in the following acceptable way. Food and or drink.

Rules for Women only

6. Women participate free of charge

7. Appropiate attire is needed and includes but not limited to, the wearing of Bikini's or very similar material that can pass for summer wear and showing off the goods.( The Jello exemption rule is in effect, whereby should you be married, you can wear a canvas bag all day and not be in violation. You can thank Jello for the harsh treatment to me to make this change in the rule.)

See? Just 7 simple rules. Barring weather and other work related issues, I am happy to say I am open for buisness to serve your fishing needs. Contact Crashnet for contact information.


comments (1) 06-05-2005

The People's Comments:

crashnet:
'Why is there no female viagra?'
Yeah, why is there no female viagra? Oh yeah that's right, because we always have to be up for it... but they don't...

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