lordlonely's wit

The Big News..for me anyway.
Jan 13, 2006

Breaking News!!!
Jan 10, 2006

I am King Kong's Bitch!
Dec 14, 2005

BREAKING NEWS!!!
Dec 09, 2005

Listen up you lucky people!!!
Nov 10, 2005

Archive

user:
Password:

A Shopping trip....part two

RING....RING

me:hello?

other voice:so whats the deal? I was going to invite you to lunch with us today, but you go off and make me so upset.

me:(cringing)about what?

other voice: Jello? so I have a fat ass or something that it is so huge you had to name it Jello?

me: I thought you were not reading this site, so whats the big deal?

Jello: (paraphrasing)her friends read it and just had to run over and say 'hi jello, look what has been written about you'

me:look, i was just going to use the J-Lo acronymn, but thought that was too overused for other people, and you deserved a new nickname. Just add an e&l and viola, Jello, and everyone loves Jello. It seemed funny when I wrote it, rather inspired I thought.

Jello: its okay, thats what I thought you were doing but, just wanted to know why you left out the pink shoes that I bought.

me:i was trying to be nice and leave that out, cause what I said was not that nice.

Jello:so whats the big deal, I like em.

me: fine, I'll post a second story about the pink shoes, later

Jello:bye

The Pink Shoes

While being drug around Burlington Coat Factory, holding the clothes jello wanted to buy in one hand and my manhood in the other to make sure they were still there, a lot of comments were said about what type of people would wear what. On average we were agreeing until we hit the shoe department.

So now being show all sorts of things that would just kill your feet to wear, jello pointed out the pink shoes. These i guess were standard shaped heels of the high height variety, covered in pink satin material with folds in it, and with a quarter inch of black lace triming the area one put the foot into.

me: looks like shoes for a two dollar .....(shutting my mouth to be polite)

jello: whore?

me:well, you said that

jello: I don't care, I like em. look some in my size and only 12.99. I am buying them for to wear to work.

me: work? i don't think so. those are the type of shoes that one wears for oh about 30 seconds after entering a room, unless somebody wants you to 'keep em on'

jello:so and your point is?

me:my point is, you buy em,and whatever you do with them, I do not want to know about it.

jello:fine

So Jello buys them and proceeds to tell her husband, who happened to call right during this, all about it.  Right now I think one of my boys has disowned me and the other is threatening to leave if I don't do something about reclaiming my manliness. Thanks Jello, just blab away to the husband right in front of me about this, nah not uncomfortable at all.

So I dragged her into the BassPro shop in a weak attempt to shed the clothing kryptonite, and make my brotherhood proud of me. I could tell Jello was not really into this part of the trip, as nothing fru-fru here. Jello was nice about trying to give me equal time. But I knew what I wanted and bam.

8lb Spiderwire Super Mono EZ multi-purpose fishing line on a 220 yd sppol at .011' diameter with fluorescent clear/blue shaded line.  This stuff rocks, and it only took me 5 minutes to find it and purchase it.  I could of bought something else, but I could tell that jello was getting tired, so I let jello off the hook and we parted ways.

end transmission

 


comments (2) 05-25-2005

The People's Comments:

lordlonely:
I think though the Jello stories are going to be on hiatus. I feel a smack to the side of my head coming. A soon to be victim of the vicious backhand.

crashnet:
I was talking to the djrobp about you calling my sister Jello... and I was right, you got in trouble :) And you tried to back out of it the way I said you would... by saying everyone loves jello. You make me proud sir... you make me proud.

Home | Site Info | Privacy Policy | Terms of Services | Jobs | Advertise Wtih LWJ | Help

Copyright 2008 Young Creative Solutions. All Rights Reserved. Copyright Notice..