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After the goldrush

This might be the dumbest thing ever asked on this legendary website, but did anyone watch the Tigers' game last night?  If so, I have a question, especially directed at Sicotte and Ingles, whom you may know as members of the baseball elite.  (I used to be in the b.e. but once I got up to college and the Tigers started sucking, I stopped paying attention and had to revoke my membership.)

What's the goddamn deal with bean balls, anyway?

If you saw the game last night, you know exactly what I'm talking about.  The Tigers took on everyone's favorite underdog team the New York Yankees, who were clinging to a tight 11-0 lead in the bottom of the 7th.  Alex Rodriquez, who already hit two homers in the game, was hit in the leg by Franklyn German (who isn't known to have the greatest control on the planet)  Of course Ram-Rod, his team and the fans thought it was intentional, despite the fact that the count was like 2-2 or something like that, and manager Alan Trammell said it wasn't intentional.  So of course, Yankees pitcher Paul Quantrill was expected to try to hit someone on the Tigers the next inning...just to prove what, exactly?  That the Yankees have bigger cocks?

So Quantrill rared back and threw a pitch at Tiger phenom Jason 'The Hammer' Smith, fortunately it soared way behind him.  So of course, after being warned by the umpire, on the very next pitch he threw right at him and hit him in the back.  Quantrill and manager Joe Torre were instantly ejected from the game, not before Quantrill started making 'come and get me' gestures towards the Tigers' dugout.  God I wish Dmitri Young would've taken him up on that offer.

Fights in hockey I understand.  Unsportsmanlike conduct in the NFL I get.  I even understand the brawling in the NBA (Artest is a certifiable lunatic and drunken fans are idiots) but I'll never ever understand the whole 'bean ball' concept.  How manly should it make you feel to take a ball and throw it 95 mph at someone's head?  Isn't that assault?  Plus, it's really annoying that it usually only happens 'because that guy hit us first!  Wah!' 

It doesn't prove anything, trust me.  Here's my idea:  If you get hit with a pitch, on your next at-bat you should have the pitcher drop his glove, then you take the ball and throw it at him and hard as you can.  And if that doesn't work, make the two have a bat fight until one guy is left standing.  Then he'll have the biggest cock.  


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